Theatrical Releases: G.I. Joe: Retaliation & The Place Beyond The Pines

G.I. JOE: RETALIATION || March 29th, 2013

GIJoeRetaliation-poster With an unexpected turn in the first act, “G.I. Joe: Retaliation” is left with little to work with. Storm Shadow (played by Byung-hun Lee) steals the show even though his return is unexplained (see the first film). The structure of the story is wobbly, adding a layer of padding to each punch, leaving no impact whatsoever. Diehard fans of the Hasbro toys may get a kick out of this, but otherwise, the film drops down to a completely average action film, losing the appeal of even the prior G.I. Joe film.
ThePlaceBeyondThePines-poster All you really have to say is Ryan Gosling, and I will want to see the film. He has become number one on my list of favorite actors and that’s saying a lot. Bradley Cooper, who is also on the list of my favorite actors, co-stars in “The Place Beyond The Pines” and director Derek Cianfrance, who teamed with Gosling for “Blue Valentine”, takes the helm once again. There is very little to turn me away from this film, and with the trailer making look even more exhilarating, I will definitely see this opening weekend.
THEATER
Temptation-poster First, let me say this doesn’t look entirely terrible. It also doesn’t look fantastic, but for a Tyler Perry film, I can somewhat say this looks intriguing, if only for the performance from Jurnee Smollett-Bell. The rest looks like a Lifetime Original Movie co-starring the untalented wreck Kim Karadasian. This may be the first and only Tyler Perry film I could see myself sitting through. 25%
MAYBE

Detour-poster Reminiscent of films like “Buried” and “127 Hours”, “Detour” places a man in a mudslide, buried in his car, and sees if he can brave the obstacle and get himself out. With no well known star to drive this vehicle like a Ryan Reynolds or James Franco, I am less inclined to see this film, and being stuck in the vehicle with him for at least 90 minutes, that can sometimes seal the deal.
PASS
FamilyWeekend-poster In one regard, I do not want to see this film because it’s been done before, better. But on the other hand, I am somewhat intrigued by the young star, Olesya Rulin, who, before this, was only a Disney starlet best known from “High School Musical” to which I have no connection. But she looks fun and could possibly carry this film, so if I do come across it, I may give it a chance. 25%

MAYBE

Fourplay-poster Films about sex can often be enjoyable, but this is too Indie and just not sexy in any way, shape, or form. PASS
TheHost-poster2 “The Host” succeeds in two ways. Saoirse Ronan overcomes the odds and delivers a worthwhile performance as best she can. The second success comes from incorporating an up-and-coming band like Imagine Dragons to sell the film and give it a voice beyond just “From the Creator of the Twilight Saga.” It’s a shame that a science fiction premise was wasted on this romantically charged and inner monologue, just another reason why Stephenie Meyer should put away her pen.
Mental-poster A little too much like a British comedy, “Mental” is too heartfelt and too much like a caricature to get interested in it. PASS
Renoir-poster “Renoir” is about a painter and a young woman to whom is painted, played by the lovely Christa Theret, to whom I am instantly attracted both physically and dramatically. This period piece doesn’t hide its sexuality and with a passionate love story as well, I cannot turn down this film.
75%

MOST LIKELY

Room237-poster “The Shining” is one of my favorite horror films of all time. So a documentary about the film is right up my alley. Also, the trailer earns bonus points for including a review from one of my favorite authors, Chuck Klosterman. Though I am not entirely sure what this film is I am intrigued enough to find out.
RENTAL
WelcomeToThePunch-poster Still not entirely sure what this film is about, with Mark Strong, James McAvoy, David Morrissey (“Walking Dead”), and Andrea Riseborough (“Oblivion”), there’s enough star power to keep me interested. RENTAL
WhiteElephant-poster Lost interest half way through. Not my cup of tea. PASS
Wrong-poster Having seen “Rubber”, I know this director is “out there”, but there is a sincerity in the trailer for “Wrong” that I am intrigued by and that may get me to see it. There’s plenty of familiar faces in this film to keep it going as well.
25%

MAYBE


THEATER

  • G.I. Joe: Retaliation
  • The Host
  • The Place Beyond The Pines

RENTAL

  • Room 237
  • Welcome To The Punch

MOST LIKELY CATCH ON NETFLIX (75%)

  • Renoir

PROBABLY CATCH ON NETFLIX (50%)

MIGHT CATCH ON NETFLIX (25%)

  • Family Weekend
  • Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor
  • Wrong

PASS

  • Detour
  • Fourplay
  • Mental
  • White Elephant

HELL NO

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