Theatrical Releases: Grown Ups 2 & Pacific Rim

PACIFIC RIM || July 12th, 2013

FruitvaleStation-poster With huge Academy Award undertones, “Fruitvale Station” has been a critical hit everywhere that it has been shown, projecting the same level of interest that “Beasts of the Southern Wild” garnered last year. From first time, African American director Ryan Coogler and apparently catapulting Michael B. Jordan’s career, this film will not be missed.
THEATER
GrownUps2-poster Exposed to this at work, “Grown Ups 2” is one of the worst reviewed movies of the summer and for good reason… it’s bad. With almost zero jokes and a childish sense of humor, the only reason this film will be seen is because parents will take their kids to it, which is just too bad. Adam Sandler needs to stop.
PASS
TheHunt-poster On a purely film/story level I do not believe I’d see “The Hunt”, but with Mads Mikkelsen and the Cannes win for Best Actor following this role, I am suddenly intrigued. Playing a school teacher that is accused of sexually assaulting one of his young students, the tensions are high in this foreign language film, even if I’m entirely sure of the motivations.
25% MAYBE
PacificRim-poster Guillermo del Toro triumphantly steps back into the director’s chair with his version of an epic hero versus monster movie, “Pacific Rim”. What sets “Rim” apart from the onslaught of science fiction action films like the comparable “Transformers” is that del Toro takes a cast of lower level familiar faces like Charlie Hunnam, Idris Elba, and Charlie Day and produces a definitive action adventure without even varying the formula that much.

Blackhats-poster The quality of “Blackhats” is laughable. The acting is rigid and melodramatic, there are lines in this trailer that had me laughing out loud, and it’s not even imitating anything notable. I couldn’t even finish this trailer, it was that bad.
PASS
CoffeeTown-poster Pairing “It’s Always Sunny” star Glenn Howerton with “Eastbound & Down” star Steve Little, “Coffee Town” looks like a mash-up of both of these comedies. Including Jake Johnson and Adrianne Palicke, there’s actually a lot going for this film, especially some really funny bits, begging the question why Howerton hasn’t done more independent comedy films?
50% PROBABLY
CrystalFairy-poster Michael Cera steps into the independent world with “Crystal Fairy and the Magical Cactus”. About friends and drugs, this comedy looks strong enough without Cera, who adds another element of watch-ability.
RENTAL
DealinWithIdiots-poster Directed by Jeff Garlin, “Dealin’ With Idiots” is a dry comedy about getting to know the parents of the kids on a little league team and how awkward and funny each of their lives are. With a huge ensemble cast and Garlin at the helm, I am somewhat interested in checking this out.
25% MAYBE
HotFlashes-poster What a crappy trailer. This ensemble cast of older actresses might as well be a tombstone for their careers. With Brooke Shields, Darryl Hannah, and Wanda Sykes, the dialogue in this film is one middle aged woman joke after another, most of them involving balls…
PASS
KillingSeason-poster With Robert De Niro and John Travolta, “Killing Season” sees De Niro, a former veteran, hunted by Travolta, who plays a Russian man bent on carrying out his hit on De Niro. With just those names alone, I will see this film, but add the level of action a thriller like this will bring and I am completely on board.
RENTAL
PawnShopChronicles-poster How “Pawn Shop Chronicles” got such a huge cast, I will never know, but we’re talking Brendan Fraser, Elijah Wood, Paul Walker, Vincent D’Onofrio, Matt Dillon, Norman Reedus, Thomas Jane, and Lukas Haas. Walker is by far out of his wheelhouse and coming from the director of “Running Scared”, I could almost see myself being interested in this film… almost.
25% MAYBE
StillMine-poster Only slightly above a Lifetime Original Movie, I am intrigued by “Still Mine”, since it is based on a true story about an old man building a house on his land despite fighting an uphill court battle about not getting building permits. This hits a chord with me and the ethics of man simply wanting to build something that is his while his wife deals with Alzheimer.
25% MAYBE
TermsAndConditionsMayApply-poster Since this sort of internet small print is relevant to my everyday life, I’m interested to see what this documentary has to say about, despite having a very vague and non-informative trailer.
75% MOST LIKELY
VHS2-poster Not quite as enthralling as its predecessor, “V/H/S/2” still holds on to most of what made the original so entertaining, with practical effects and deep, hardworking scares, remaining the best use of found footage to date. Weaving together four short films of macabre nature with a fifth over arcing film, five different directors take a stab at telling their dark, grotesque stories.

THEATER

  • Frutivale Station
  • Pacific Rim
  • V/H/S/2

RENTAL

  • Crystal Fairy & The Magical Cactus
  • Killing Season

MOST LIKELY CATCH ON NETFLIX (75%)

  • Terms & Conditions May Apply

PROBABLY CATCH ON NETFLIX (50%)

  • Coffee Town

MIGHT CATCH ON NETFLIX (25%)

  • Dealin’ With Idiots
  • The Hunt
  • Pawn Shop Chronicles
  • Still Mine

PASS

  • Blackhats
  • Grown Ups 2
  • The Hot Flashes

HELL NO

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