Theatrical Releases: Lee Daniels’ The Butler & Kick-Ass 2

KICK-ASS 2 || August 16th, 2013

Austenland-poster People who love Pride & Prejudice will love this new film, “Austenland”, starring Keri Russell as she adventures to a Jane Austen experience that recreates the world of the film. What looks to be the outline of every since romantic comedy ever made and having zero interest in Jane Austen, I can completely pass on this film with zero remorse.
PASS
KickAss2poster On about the same level as its predecessor, “Kick Ass 2” delivers more bang for your buck but ultimately loses something in the passing of time. What once was hilarious is now just average, as Mindy McCready (Chloe Moretz) once stole the spotlight as the smart-mouthed twelve year old who took to murder as second nature, now becomes an older teenager, where the foul mouth and personal vendettas reek too much of “Mean Girls” and not enough like the original concept that was the original “Kick Ass”.
Butler-poster Lee Daniels’ follow-up to Academy Award nominated “Precious” and last year’s “The Paperboy”, “The Butler” stars Forest Whittaker as Cecil Gaines, the butler for many American presidents with a story to tell. With a huge ensemble cast, playing several different key American history figures, this film will not be missed and could hold some definite Oscar potential.
THEATER
PatienceStone-poster “The Patience Stone” is the story of an Afghan woman watching her comatose husband who was wounded in battle and abandoned. Left in a room alone with him, she begins to confess her secrets with him, something that their culture often prohibits in marriage. As strong as this story sounds, I’m afraid I won’t be seeing it.
PASS

AbandonedMine-poster Low budget and low quality, “Abandoned Mine” looks laughable at best with zero attention showed to any cinematic intelligence. Why Alexa Vega agreed to star in this, I will never know.
PASS
AintThemBodiesSaints-poster Highlighted with three of best performances this year, “Ain’t Them Bodies Saints” takes a minimal storyline and creates an authentic and emotion-filled canvas for these young and bright actors to paint this heart-wrenching drama with their God-given talents.  Often creating the mood of Western, “Ain’t Them Bodies Saints” escapes the bonds of similar films while not having to adhere to any “based on a true story” moniker, creating a truly original story.
BlueExorcist-poster As I am not into anime and since this trailer does little to nothing to get me invested, add “Blue Exorcist: The Movie” to yet another animated film I will not be seeing.
PASS
CutieAndTheBoxer-poster Art documentaries are creating their own sub-genre in documentaries. Chronicling prevalent artists is catching on in American cinema. But unless it’s an artist that I know or have fondly heard of, it is hard for me to get invested. “Cutie and the Boxer” is neither of those cases and despite its higher quality, there’s little that interests me with this married couple.
PASS
DrewManBehindThePoter-poster In loving the cinema, one always has to appreciate the movie poster and with the documentary, “Drew: The Man Behind The Poster”, we are treated to being introduced to the man that has brought movie posters to life over the years, with his continued work with George Lucas, Steven Spielberg, and Robert Zemeckis, among countless others. Filled with director and actor interviews, I am actually excited to see this documentary. RENTAL
HauteCuisine-poster From the producers of “The Intouchables”, to which I have not yet seen, “Haute Cuisine” is a dramatic comedy about a woman that enters into the kitchen for President of the Republic and whips the staff into shape. Sadly, none of this is striking of enough to garner my attention. PASS
Jobs-poster Ashton Kutcher as Steve Jobs seems like an odd choice, but already with the trailer, I am on board. “Jobs” is the story of Steve as he ventures into the world of technology. As far as dramatic biopics go, this one looks well produced and well acted and will be entertaining to see.
THEATER
JusticeIsMind-poster However interesting this idea could have been, it looks like it was filmed and directed by a toddler, with horrid camera angles and some of the worst line delivery I’ve ever heard. “Justice Is Mind” looks like crap.
HELL NO
Paranoia-poster Only entertaining on the most basic of levels, without its seasoned cast and glossy shine film quality, “Paranoia” would be, as the critics have already called it, “borderline unwatchable”. Touting a cast of Harrison Ford and Gary Oldman once again on opposing sides, and Liam Hemsworth with Amber Heard getting stuck in between these moguls, no one would have guessed the plot structure and delivery would not be anything less than amazing.

Spark-poster Brilliantly filmed, “Spark: A Burning Man Story” is a documentary about the Burning Man festival, which takes place in a desert in Nevada, involving huge pyrotechnics and self-expression. Following the history of the festival and the lives these people lead, bringing them to the festival, this looks fairly interesting.
50% PROBABLY
StandingUp-poster As far as trailers go, “Standing Up” is an example of a film I had zero desire to see, but delivers such a powerful trailer with the use of B.O.B. and Taylor Swift to bring out the highlights of the film. About two kids that are picked on during camp and run away together, this film star Radha Mitchell and Val Kilmer alongside these unknown kids.
25% MAYBE
ThisIsMartinBonner-poster “This Is Martin Bonner” won an Audience Award at Sundance, but a few seconds into the trailer I couldn’t shake the strong feeling of boredom, to which I’m afraid I will not be giving any time to this film.
PASS

THEATER

  • Ain’t Them Bodies Saints
  • The Butler
  • Jobs
  • Kick Ass 2
  • Paranoia

RENTAL

  • Drew: The Man Behind The Poster

MOST LIKELY CATCH ON NETFLIX (75%)

PROBABLY CATCH ON NETFLIX (50%)

  • Spark: A Burning Man Story

MIGHT CATCH ON NETFLIX (25%)

  • Standing Up

PASS

  • Abandoned Mines
  • Austenland
  • Blue Exorcist: The Movie
  • Cutie And The Boxer
  • Haute Cuisine
  • The Patience Stone
  • This Is Martin Bonner

HELL NO

  • Justice Is Mind

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